It happened again
It happened again. Every year I get so close to winning the "MOTY" award (Mother-of-the-year) and every May I ruin my lead and any chance at victory. I'm not even sure there is a real prize for the winner, but I keep playing along anyways. It's just that when you have so many kids everyone tells you the same thing, "You are such a good mom." And so you start believing it. At least January through April you believe it, because by the the end of the school year I know exactly where I stand.
Let's see, in the last month I have:
-Sent Naomi to school in her brother's underwear 80% of the time.
-Completely forgotten about Canaan's field day.
-Intentionally ignored Judah's research assignment. I mean let's be real, I was gonna be the engine pushing that one through and I just didn't have it in me. One zero won't fail him for all of second grade, right?
-Paid for 3 lost library books. Dear Librarian, Please stop letting my kids check out books. They don't keep up with them and I don't need anything else to be responsible for.
-Sent Naomi to school in her brother's shoes because every single pair she owns were MIA.
-Had a teacher ask Silas if he used shampoo in his hair. I'm just thankful she assumed he was getting a bath because.... he wasn't.
-Intentionally ordered extra pizza for dinner so that we could have it for breakfast the next day.
-Packed Silas' lunch using only aluminum foil, because we've been out of baggies for a week.
-Knowingly brushed multiple kids teeth with the same toothbrush because I don't know which one belongs to who anymore and I figure any brushing is a win right now.
-And finally I adopted a new discipline technique called "Fight to the Death." It's simple and works like this: The initial stimulus can vary, but usually involves one child yelling "STOP IT" at another child. Or sometimes it's a certain high pitched scream from downstairs or maybe someone comes to me crying "Momma, he blah blah blah ....." But regardless of how it starts, my part is always the same. I yell as loud as I can over the chaos "I am so tired of the fighting. I can't deal with it anymore. You are just gonna have to fight it to the death. Let me know who loses. We will mourn the loss and then move on as a family."
I got the genius idea from Angela on The Office when she said:
Let's see, in the last month I have:
-Sent Naomi to school in her brother's underwear 80% of the time.
-Completely forgotten about Canaan's field day.
-Intentionally ignored Judah's research assignment. I mean let's be real, I was gonna be the engine pushing that one through and I just didn't have it in me. One zero won't fail him for all of second grade, right?
-Paid for 3 lost library books. Dear Librarian, Please stop letting my kids check out books. They don't keep up with them and I don't need anything else to be responsible for.
-Sent Naomi to school in her brother's shoes because every single pair she owns were MIA.
-Had a teacher ask Silas if he used shampoo in his hair. I'm just thankful she assumed he was getting a bath because.... he wasn't.
-Intentionally ordered extra pizza for dinner so that we could have it for breakfast the next day.
-Packed Silas' lunch using only aluminum foil, because we've been out of baggies for a week.
-Knowingly brushed multiple kids teeth with the same toothbrush because I don't know which one belongs to who anymore and I figure any brushing is a win right now.
-And finally I adopted a new discipline technique called "Fight to the Death." It's simple and works like this: The initial stimulus can vary, but usually involves one child yelling "STOP IT" at another child. Or sometimes it's a certain high pitched scream from downstairs or maybe someone comes to me crying "Momma, he blah blah blah ....." But regardless of how it starts, my part is always the same. I yell as loud as I can over the chaos "I am so tired of the fighting. I can't deal with it anymore. You are just gonna have to fight it to the death. Let me know who loses. We will mourn the loss and then move on as a family."
I got the genius idea from Angela on The Office when she said:
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But, so far we still have 8 kids, and there has been plenty of fighting so apparently no one is obeying me. Figures.
Add that to my list of MOTY fails.
posted by Christina at
10:33 AM
2 Comments:
I love love love love this thank you for making me understand we are all doing our best to get it right but i aint perfect by nooooooo means!!!! Lol
OH MY friend. I LOVE it! You are an amazing Mom - just like the rest of us...You only have a few more blessings to handle on a daily basis. I nominate you as MOTY anyway!
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